Once Upon A Little Farm

A Glimpse Into Our Country Life

Weekends Are The Hardest

on January 19, 2013

Last weekend was when I had my little nervous breakdown of sorts.  My week felt overwhelming, but bearable.  Now it’s the weekend again and I’ve already been in tears a number of times before 2 PM on a Saturday.   I’m not sure exactly why, but weekends are the absolute toughest for me.  I am not sure if it’s the complete lack of routine that gets me all off kilter.  Monday through Friday have more routine with Aaron going to work each morning, getting the kids up and going.  Mondays the kids go downstairs to my moms for 4 hours while I go to work. Tuesdays and Thursdays, Reid goes downstairs to my mom’s while Onnolee and I head to preschool for 2 hours.  Wednesdays, I drop both kids off at their Godmother’s house while I got to work for 4 hours.  Fridays the kids and I usually take my mother-in-law to the store and  on any other errands she needs to do.  Weekends just don’t have the same schedule and set routines.  I think I crumble when I don’t know exactly what is expected of me.  Could be that weekends just hold a ton more time to clean and do some badly needed organizing when there’s a voice inside of me just screaming to do something creative.  I feel guilty spending time on creative outlets and guilty spending money on creative outlets.  I keep thinking I really want to make some things that would sell at our stand come spring – thinking that would justify me taking the time and money to do it – but I don’t know what and I don’t know when or how I’d make them.  So for now, I just keep plugging along wiping the tears and doing all that I can to keep some composure.  My husband, God bless him, has done all of the dishes, so at least we’re back on track with them after almost a week’s worth being piled high in the sink, on the counter, on the table, on the stove top, perhaps even on the floor.  I helped take the Christmas decorations down.  However, the decorations still need to be taken to the attic and the tree carried outside.  As soon as Reid’s nap is over, we’re headed to have dinner with some friends, which will be good for me.  Here’s hoping Sunday holds less tears and more productivity!

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